Yes, that is the question of the day. Seems everyone has an opinion of whether or not it is time to cut Cullen's hair. Daddy has been ready for weeks, while Mommy was not in a hurry to say goodbye to those beautiful baby curls. But over the last few weeks I have had several comments from well meaning family members that, perhaps, it's time. So there lies the question. To cut or not to cut?
Seems like a simple enough question, but with it comes a bit more complexity. As I often do with his hair, I have consulted various African American friends and coworkers (as well as strangers) with this question. The answer from them was a resounding, NO! It appears that the first hair cut for AA babies is typically held off until one year of age. I have heard everything from it's tradition, to it will change the texture of his hair, it will give him "bad hair" and then my favorite....it will make him stutter. My conclusion? It is purely cultural.
Which is where the complexity and questions begin. Although Cullen is half black and half white, society views him as black. Fair enough, I'm cool with that. But the fact is that he is being raised in a white family in a predominently white neighborhood, and (with the exception of a few friends in the adoption community) around mostly caucasian friends. I get the idea behind fostering his pride is his heritage and culture. But to what extent? He is also half Italian. Does that mean I should serve sauce on Sundays? I guess my question is where/what is the appropriate balance?
So, to parents out there raising children of another culture, what do you do or do you plan to do in order to incorporate your childs heritage? How do you celebrate differences without making your child feel different?
As for the hair....Mommy caved. I called a local salon who specialized in AA children's hair, but they wouldn't give me an appointment :-( Said he was too young. So we stopped in a few salons at the mall. And guess what. Daddy chickened out! Appears he was all talk all along. I guess he isn't ready either. So for now, the hair stays, but the questions it raises remain. So I would love to hear from some other families out there!
Oh and lastly, Cullen started saying "Mumma" this weekend. Is it possible for my heart to swell any larger with love for this boy!
